The 168-Hour Work Week

When I was a boy, everyone was excited about the promise of emerging technology. We were sending astronauts into space, and man was well on his way to the grand prize of walking on the moon. It seemed as though nothing was impossible.

Futurism was our passion. We imagined a time when ingenious, intelligent devices would enhance our lives in limitless ways. Machines would handle the most tedious and dangerous tasks, and we would have more time for leisure and relaxation. 

Those fantastic, futuristic machines did emerge as promised, but they didn't save us time and labor as expected. Life is busier today than it was in my boyhood at the dawn of the Space Age. People work very hard, and free time is scarce.


Unintended Consequences

Two trends began to blossom in the 1980's - the miniaturization of technology and the popularization of interactive wireless communications. 

The advent of the laptop computer (and more recently the tablet) meant that we could take our work along with us wherever we went. Pagers (and later Blackberries and smart phones) enabled our offices and our clients to contact us at any time of day regardless of our location. Now, even when we are in transit we are reachable.


Redefining the Workplace

Traditionally, work was associated with a place. We "went" to work. We joined our colleagues at an appointed time in a place where the work could be done efficiently. And then we left work, and we didn't think about it until our next shift was about to begin. 

Now, work is ubiquitous and inescapable. 

- We are expected to produce work through the weekend and during the evening hours.

- We are expected to monitor our email inboxes around the clock.

- We are expected to meet regularly with global colleagues regardless of time zone differences.

- All of the functions that we perform in the office, we are expected to be able to do at home or on the road.

- We are expected to drop everything in our private lives anytime an issue threatens to delay or defer the company's ability to generate income. 

The telephone rings in the middle of the night. No one thinks twice about waking us up. When problems have to be addressed, the company expects "all hands on deck" no matter what time it is.

When that call comes in, we are expected to rise from a deep sleep and perform immediately and flawlessly. We might be asked to answer a complex business question or resolve a pressing technology problem. And then, of course, we are expected to show up at work by nine o'clock the next morning, ready to tackle a full day of challenges. 

The human body isn't well-suited to handle this kind of stress on a regular basis. I once went through a stretch where I received telephone calls at around 3 in the morning every night for three months. I was on the verge of collapse. But compared to my colleagues, I had a relatively light schedule. I worked with folks who fielded multiple calls every night, and this went on for years. I have no idea how they survived, but I can assure you that they weren't happy about it. And neither were their spouses. I felt bad about complaining when other people were being put through so much worse.


Time Off

Work now stretches into our planned time off and interrupts important events. People take their laptops with them on vacation - it's expected by their management. Leaving the laptop at home is not an option.

"Work calls" intrude upon every moment of our lives - dinners, weddings, your child's performance in the school play - and we are expected to take those calls, stay on the line for as long as we are required, respond immediately to every demand that's made, and follow up with additional telephone calls as necessary. Of course, you'll be expected to have your laptop handy so you can work on the solution in real time. Never mind that your niece is about to walk down the aisle. Tell the family that you have to take a conference call.


First Right Of Refusal

What option do you have? Are you willing to refuse to take that call? Turn off your phone? Say, "No, I'm sorry, but I don't want to be contacted while I'm on my honeymoon?"

Good luck with that!

It might be okay. Depending on your boss's demeanor, you might actually get away with it. But even if he doesn't get upset with you, the incident will be remembered. 

Months from now, when he sits across from you in that sterile little conference room to discuss your annual review, he'll remember the time that you turned off your phone and didn't respond for three hours. Never mind that your kid was playing in the Little League World Series that day. He won't remember those details. He'll only recall that you weren't available when he tried to phone. Five times. And then had to explain to HIS boss that he wasn't able to get in touch with you.

And when HIS boss gets called into that secret meeting where they look over the roster of people in the department and decide who might make a good target for upcoming layoffs, your name will pop out of the list. 

"Oh yes! That slacker who doesn't return phone calls during times of imminent crisis."


Beating The Odds

Of course, we're assuming that you boss isn't a control freak. Or has a passive aggressive streak. Or anger management issues. 

If you work for a hot head, the consequences of not taking that call will be more immediate and confrontational. Prepare for an over the phone tongue lashing at the very least. Or a stern lecture from a red-faced manager with veins popping out of his head. 

In that case, you might not want to return to the office at all. Telephone the admin and ask them to pack up your desk and send the personal items via FedEx. I'm kidding, of course, but I've been in situations where disappearing altogether might have been the least miserable option.

But hey, not to worry! You're probably in luck. Surely, there can't be that many control freaks, passive aggressive bosses, and foaming hot heads in corporate management. I would estimate that you have at least a fifty percent chance that your boss isn't emotionally unstable.


Until next time: keep your spirits high, your stress levels low, and laugh as often as possible. 

Copyright © 2014 www.corporateabsurdity.com 
All Rationality Reserved 

In Our Own Image

God made man in His own image, but something went awry.

Man made the corporation in HIS own image - greedy, short-sighted, well-meaning, petty, delusional, disorganized - and just about everything went awry.

Corporations have been responsible for some of mankind's greatest achievements - ship building, railroads, telecommunications, the automobile, affordable air travel, vaccines, and the personal computer. 

Corporations are also responsible for toxic waste, environmental disasters, strip mining, deforestation, fast food, junk food, and a number of harmful medications.

I have been a member of corporate society for decades. I have worked for more corporations than I can count on my fingers. The experience has been enjoyable most of the time, silly some of the time, and downright shameful on occasion. 

Corporations, like the people who manage and work in them, are complex, amazing, unpredictable, and full of quirks and annoyances.

Here, we'll explore the fine lines between productivity and insanity, between innovation and ineptitude, between teamwork and turf wars, between vision and hubris, resolve and insolvency, between keeping things running and running the operation into the ground. 

Think of this blog as a regularly scheduled conference call for discussing everything about corporations that should work better but doesn't - including the people who use the office phone to call overseas relatives and that sloppy-looking fellow who waits for your meetings to let out so he can help himself to free refreshments.

After the beep, please state your name followed by the pound key.


Until next time: keep your spirits high, your stress levels low, and laugh as often as possible.

Copyright © 2014 www.corporateabsurdity.com 
All Rationality Reserved